Rejection Proof – Jia Jiang

imageDo you lack in self-confidence? Then you must train to get rejections. You have to do like Jia Jian, a young chinese who left his country and came to live in the USA. He got a very well paid job and abandomned it because he wanted to become an enterpreneur. Then he noticed that he could not become the new Bill Gates because he was too afraid to get… rejections. This fear blocked him and made him tremble.

He therefore started a strange journey: he decided to do odd requests to people, so that they would tell him “NO!”: in this way, he would get accustomed to rejections. Yes, self-confidence can be trained like a muscle.

Some of his requests were really strange: for instance, he asked to play football in the garden of an unknown man; to welcome passengers on a plane; to borrow some money from a warden; to teach in a university class; and so on. But stranger than his requests, were the answers of people: some of them said “yes!”, and this was a total surprise to him.

Actually, he learned a lot of thing about rejections. Not only he learned not to desperate; but also how to handle the requests or the following chat to obtain a positive reaction.
Instead of being too shy to go on with discussion, for instance, he learned to ask the reasons of the naysayer. Or not to bother about results and to do nevertheless his best.

A negative answer is rarely a rejection of your personality. It is often due to moment or personal story.
Anyway, although I understand what Jian did, I think… Well, no, I would never find the courage.
I already have my problems in asking the colleague of purchasing department when we can despatch some products, and this is my job! You can imagine the color of my face or the tone of my voice if I had to ask the postman to deliver the post on his place…

But try to imagine: what could you do if you had no such fear?
You could do almost everything.

I could start inviting some of my beloved Writers to come dinner here! Oh, well… I think it would be rather difficult to convince them to eat plant-based. Ok, I got it. Let’s go to next book.

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Numero Primo di Marco Paolini: Aiuto!



Quando ieri sera sono entrata al Teatro Pascutto di S. Stino di Livenza (VE), i biglietti erano già stati tutti venduti. Il bigliettaio: “Stiamo aspettando se la compagnia libera 3 posti”.

C’erano già altre quattro persone prima di me. Stavo per andarmene quando mi sento dire: “Aspetti, aspetti…”

Così mi sono ritrovata mezz’ora dopo sul palco, a due metri da Paolini, con in mano un quaderno dove scrivere quello che lo spettacolo mi suscitava. “E’ uno studio per me”, ci ha detto Paolini.

Studio? Adoro lo studio!

Purtroppo da quello che ho appuntato sul quaderno, Paolini non ricaverà un gran ché: sono uscita dal teatro ancora meditabonda, chiedendomi se l’autore del testo non fosse stato in trip psichedelico quando l’aveva scritto. Ma mi ero fatta la stessa domanda quando ero andata a vedere “Aspettando Godot”.

Fino all’illuminazione.

Nel caso di Paolini, l’illuminazione mi è venuta da un nome: Echné, la “madre” di Numero Primo.

Echnè: suona come Téchne

Dunque, ecco come interpreto io il significato di questo spettacolo: la tecnologia fa nascere i numeri primi (vedi la solitudine e l’intelligenza dei numeri primi di Giordano), e ce li affida perché li proteggiamo. Da cosa?

Bè, sono fragili, in questo mondo dove i Steve Jobs prendono il posto che una volta spettava ai nostri poeti. Per colpire un Numero Primo basta un gabbiano che conosce il tuo numero di targa, basta una fobia creata ad hoc dai media.

Significativo che Paolini inizi parlando degli occhi del figlio, e che alla fine il bambino di occhi ne abbia solo uno. L’altro gli è stato asportato chirurgicamente. Dunque, ci sono due occhi all’inizio e poi, dopo esser passati attraverso il mondo del Centro Commerciale, ce n’è uno solo, per di più chiuso dal coma.

Ettore non ha protetto il figlio dai pericoli della neve artificiale, dal ghiaccio della tecnologia. Figlio, faccio notare, di una siriana ma con un nome francese

Ci sarebbero tante altre cose da dire, perché niente del monologo era casuale, ogni visione era una metafora strettamente intrecciate alle altre. Ma io vado a teatro una volta ogni due anni: lascio questo lavoro a chi ne sa più di me.

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All rivers go to the sea – Elie Wiesel

imageElie Wiesel is a Jewish journalist who got the Peace Nobel Prize in 1986. He is a Buchenvald survivor.

In this autobiography he doesn’t write a lot about this hard experience – you can find it in his novel “The Night” – but he writes about his life before and after that.

I was strucked about the story of the village fool, when Wiesel was young. The fool had come back by miracle from a deportation camp and told everybody to run away, not to stay there, not to await Death. But nobody listened to him, because those stories could not be true. Nobody did believe him.

After the concentration camp, Wiesel is a poor stateless person. But he manages to become journalist and, year after year, despite his extreme shyness, to meets and ties strong relationship with important intellectuals.

I do not say that he became rich. I say that he got success: because he did what he loved. He could correct me, now, and say that he did what he needed to: witness. But the result doesn’t change: he had found his way.

We come back to the issue of previous post: not to content yourself. Maslow said, that a poet must write, if he wants to be in peace with himself: this is valid for everyone.

Wiesel got a rich inellectual life through:

  1. books: he studied all his life long. I may not like Israel, but I like jewish love for books.
  2. friends. I mean, true friends, who had past, interests and/or religion in common with him. He has chosen his friends (for instance, Mauriac, Golda Meir, Lieberman…). Again: the power of choices!

How I would meet someone who still learns books by heart…

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You deserve the Best – Lucia Giovannini

imageLucia Giovannini is a former fashion model. She has a Doctorate in Psychology and Counselling and she is member of American Psychological Association. She is a NLP trainer and she has founded BlessYou! association, wich aims to personal and social consciousness.

Although the main tecniques she mentions are the same ones of Tony Robbins (for instance, the “Questions” tecnique), I like giovannini for her personality.

She has reached her self consciousness through a very personal path, she has travelled all around the world to study different spiritual ways, and her approach doesn’t aim to success, but to happiness. It could seems the same thing, but the change of words is a change of mindset.

The part I like most is the one about habits and training.

Little gestures make the difference. Big transformations are due to piling up of many little steps and little results. Everything starts from habits wich lead our lives. We do not choose our future, habits do it.

The secret of our future is written in our daily routine.

The only way to change a habit, is to create a new one. You can choose calm instead of anger, for instance and thus reinforce the neuronal path of calm.

In the daily life you forget the power of choices. You forget to choose.

You take what you find in your path, you do not look for something else. You are content with this house, this husband, this work, this country. As if you do not deserve the best.

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Full of Life – John Fante


I thought that this was the authobiography of a writer; actually, it is the autobiography of a becoming father.

The story starts when Fante has already experienced the poverty but hungry years are over now: he has a wife and a nice house.

But his wife is pregnant and her personality offers a new side each day.

The biggest problem, however, arises when the house is invaded by white ants. The chipest solution is to take a plane and meet his father and ask him, a bricklayer, to help them with the floor and the walls that are softer than a chocolate cake.

Well: Fante’s parents are Italian immigrants. The description of his mother fainting down when he pops up in front of her, is simply exhilarating. Exaggerated? Not so much!

And the dislike of his father for books? And the second-rate theology of the Italian priester? And the wife who wants to become catholic?

So cure, this book.

Just the happy end is irrealistic: it seems that all problems are over when the child is born.

Well, my guy, this is just the beginning…

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My Life And Work – Henry Ford


The title is the first lie: it doesn’t tell anything about his private life; he hardly mentions his wife and son. And why “My”? This book is written not by Ford, but Samuel Crowther, a journalist, while Ford was at the highest point of his career as businessman and engineer.

This book is not written with the purpose of selling more cars: Ford hates advertising, he thinks that a product should be sold because of its quality and that advertising conceals the seller’s or manufacturer’s insecurity.

This book doesn’t mention Ford’s failures, neither the business nor the political ones. It doesn’t mention his war against trade-unionist movement and doesn’t tell that he recruited professional fighters to face the… “disturbing” workers.

It doesn’t talk about a lot of things, because the purpose of this book is to justify the massproduction, not to tell a private life; to specify wich position workers should hold, not to inspire a worker to become a company owner.

On the other hand, I took this book because I hoped to find something inspiring, something enlighting about success after failure, or about fear fighting.

Nothing of this.

I think, that if I would meet Henry Ford now, I would not like him.

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Rich Dad, Poor Dad – Robert T. Kiyosaki

imageIncrease your assets, not your liabilities.

House is a liability.

Work on your financial intelligence.

These are just three of the many points repeated in this book (although you won’t find any true practical point). Kiyosaki suggests us to make your money work for you, not the contrary, and this is theoretically true, but the few examples he makes do not go deep in the matter. True is that, if you want to make money without dying for too much work, you have to study hard the following 4 subjects:

  • accountancy
  • Investments
  • marketing
  • laws

This is not for me. Yes, I have taken the highest mark at the accountancy secondary school, but I hate that subject! Moreover, I would not be able to stand for the high financial pressure, the need to check markets and shares; I fear loosing money and, last but not least, I have zero intuition for real estates up and downs.

In one word: no. This is not my way to become rich.

But I agree with some Kiyosaki’s assumpions. First of all: employee working won’t make you rich. Well, Kiyosaki says that hard working is old fashioned (and said by a person who retired at 47 and lives without working, it sounds interesting). Exactly the opposite stated by Henry Ford in his “My Life and my work”, where work is considered as natural as human being exhistence. Two completely different points of views, in two different historical times, but with a point in common: they are stated by rich people. Another proof that paper lets her be written and that you have to find your own way to live.

Kiyosaki criticises employees attitude: their acceptance of things as they are, the gift of own energy and time to someone who will become rich. He says: do not work in a company, but create a company.

The mouse race is the one of the middle classe person. You work harder because you want to get more money, but the more you work, the more you have to pay for taxes. And then, the more you grew rich, the more you buy, without asking yourself if a Porsche or a bigger house are liabilities or if they create cashflows…

Kiyosaki is a great fan of elusion’s techniques. And it is also true that schools do not teach you how to become rich. They (should) teach you how become an employee. Your true richness is your mind, but you must study all your life long, and you must work also on your communications skills: learning how to sell is often more important than what you sell.

I was particularly  impresed by one of his statements: he claimed to be a best seller author, not a great writer.

Last comment: Kiyosaki and other people like him become richer and richer without producing anything material. We come back to my old assumption that the future is made by services to people, not things production. But what strikes me is that such people are rich despite the so called worl crisis. I mean: the money in circulation on the earth is not less than the period when the crisis was far away. Therefore… if the total volume of money is stil the same, and it is just distributed in a different way, the crisis is subjective. Maybe this is an old truth for you. For me it is a total enlightenment.

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